The Harry Potter Fan Club
by Dementors hate chocolate
Summary: Just a ridiculous story I wrote about Harry taunting Malfoy.


Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

Setting: Second year, Hogwarts courtyard

Harry and Ron are discussing Quidditch, and Hermione is reading 'Voyages with Vampires' again.

A small mousy-haired boy walked up to harry and stared intently at him, but he was so engrossed in his conversation with Ron that he didn't notice until the boy said, "All right, Harry?"

"Huh?" Harry said, turning to see who was talking to him. The boy was a first year; Harry had seen him trying on the Sorting Hat the night before.

"I'm Colin Creeevy. I'm in Griffindor, too! Can I -do you think it would be ok if I could have a picture? So I can prove I met you?" Colin said, holding up a muggle camera. "Maybe your friend could take it while I stand next to you? And afterward could you sign it?"

"Signed photos? You're giving out signed photos, Potter?" Malfoy had just sauntered into to the courtyard, followed by his cronies, Crabbe and Goyle.

"Yeah, that's right, Malfoy. I'm starting a Harry Potter fan club. Do you want to join?" Harry said with a smirk.

"What do your ginger and the mudblood think about this?" Malfoy said.

Ron stood up, his ears turning red, and Hermione put down her book to watch.

Harry grabbed Ron's wand from him before he could curse Malfoy and replied, "Oh they think it's a great idea. In fact, they're helping me design buttons and t-shirts with my name on it, and we're writing the lyrics to my theme song."

And then to Malfoy's surprise, Harry roared to the people studying or talking in the courtyard, "Hey, everyone, I'm giving out signed photos! And anybody who wants to join the Harry Potter fan club, line up here."

The courtyard was quiet for a moment as everyone stared at Harry, then some people shrugged, and starting lining up.

"Harry, what are you thinking?" Hermione hissed at him. Harry started laughing, and pointed at Malfoy. He was standing, dumb-founded, staring at Harry, and the long line that was forming. Crabbe and Goyle got on the end of the line.

"What the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" Malfoy said angrily.

"Getting signed photos." Crabbe said.

"You twits, it's Potter." Malfoy said, and roughly pushed Crabbe out of the line.

"Let's go. Now." Malfoy snarled at them.

"What's the matter, Malfoy? Going to try to put together your own fan club? Who's going to join? Your two henchmen?" Harry taunted Malfoy.

At this point, Ron was rolling on the ground, howling with laughter at the look on Malfoy's face, and even Hermione showed a small grin.

"Come on everyone, let's laugh at Malfoy." Harry said, waving his arms at the crowd that had formed. As everyone started sniggering, Malfoy and his cronies slunk out of the courtyard, defeated, just as Gilderoy Lockhart entered.

"What's this I hear, Harry, about you giving out signed photographs?" Lockhart said.

"Yes, I'm starting a fan club." Harry said to him. He turned to Colin and said, "Could you take a picture of me?"

"Sure thing, Harry." Colin squeaked and snapped a photo and handed it to Harry.

Harry asked Hermione for a quill and some ink, which she had in her bag, and quickly signed the photo.

"Here you go, Professor." Harry said, handing it to Lockhart. "Keep that as a daily reminder that I'm more famous, and awesome, then you'll ever be, and that's without trying."

"Come on, guys." Harry said, motioning towards Ron and Hermione. They left the courtyard, leaving the huge crowd of students standing there looking confused about what had just happened, and Lockhart, who for once had lost his smile as he stared at Harry's picture.

That day, in Potions class, the Griffindors all entered wearing Harry Potter buttons, shirts, and jewelry and holding Harry Potter signed photos.

"Like my following, Malfoy?" Harry said, before sniggering and taking his seat.

From then on, everytime Harry passed Malfoy, he would say, "Want to join my fan club, Malfoy?" just to remind Malfoy that he was awesome, and Malfoy was just a stinky ferret.


End file.
